still continuing

So I've been thinking of deleting this blog and let it gone forever, but look, there's a post updated here now, i guess there's just too much things to be kept here, and showing how much i've grown by reading the oldest post compare to now.
I just don't know what to write in this blog, and since is public, I CAN'T SIMPLY POST WHATEVER I WANT~!! hahahahahahaha

but still gonna throw in some updates, probably most of you has already know all about it~

there goes 3 weeks back, another 2 of my babes left, cheryl and Jiaern~! i hate farewells, so of course I cried, and guess what I was the 1 that cried the most on the spot. gah i'm a cry baby i know. but I still miss them lah!!
Is hard even thou when they're here we didn't really talk much, but at least i have some1 to randomly text or call to hang out. but now....oh wells life gotta go on, but I'm gonna wait for them to come back, or just hoping till the day where i manage to save lots of money and visit them.

well i just hope for the best for both of them. And yea i am jealous that they seemed to have lots of fun there when i'm all alone here, pfft!

Next comes to work
So a few of my colleagues has already left the school. Well I miss all of them, Sara, Pui Shan, Emilia and Anisah, especially SARA~!!! I've been working with her for 1 year and 8 months ever since the day i started working in this company. Without her I wouldn't have been able to handle a class alone by myself now. I've learnt soooo much and it all thanks to her! Boo for not being able to work with her anymore.

well of course i wish her and the rest all the best in their future ahead. I'm happy for all of them.

So basically, I'm working with a younger age group now from 3-4 years old with Rani, and yea she's a great helper, am totally grateful to have her.
It was challenging for me for the 1st 2 weeks, and totally got sooo confused with everything. Well, it has been a month working with those children now, and I do enjoy that class alot, children there are just sooooo cute! well of course there're some that do get on my nerves, what to do? tell me which job that doesn't stress u up?

speaking abt my job, more and more freelance jobs are coming to me, which is a good thing~! it means more income! muahahahahaha!! but still spending soo much.

Basically that's all, nth much going in my life, meh what a boring life I have, well the latest was me going to S'pore with Anita and Jiaern, which was during mid august, went to universal studio and night safari there. All I can say is, things there are SOOOOO EXPENSIVE~!! but I kinda love that place, only if I'm earning s'pore money.

so this is us in universal studio.


Next, don't ask me about partying, I've been missing out all the parties, the last time I partied was i guess July??!! gah I know, I suck! hahahaha well, wrong timing when I was being asked, is either I have other plans, or I wasn't feeling good at all. Well I miss partying lah~!!!

I guess nth much else to say, just some updates about myself. Told'ya my blog is getting boring~
cz my life is.

Hopefully more to come.
xoxo

hair attempts

different hair style i have throughout the years







which do u like the best? =)

Jasper

well obviously Jasper won't know how to read this, but am just sharing these with you people.
FYI, showing that how sad I am doesn't mean that I'm not letting it go. Sorry but I get annoyed with people trying to ask me not to be sad, come on lah, you try having a pet for 9 years and he's dead, how can you not be sad. But of course I do accept the fact that living being has to go thru the life cycle, from born, till growing up, then falling sick and till death.

so Please people, stop asking me to let go or whatever, is my 1st and one and only dog, I'm not letting it go off my heart. I may be sad for sometime, well we humans have to get used to it.
Sorry if i did offended any of you, not trying to do so, am just telling you how I feel.

so starting from year 2002
having a friend brought her dog to my place, and we were liking the dog alot, and she's saying that this baby girl has other brother and sister as well therefore, we decided to have 1, and beg my parents for a very long time till 1 day my mom brought home a super smelly 2-3 months old goldish white dog in a box. Damm he is really stinky! hahahaha
so the 1st thing we do is to give him a good shower. So yea, practically he's quiet and guess what, the owner named him Casey. and we were like, eww this name is just weird for a male dog, and we double checked yes it is a male. So then we decided to change his name to Jasper. Yes inspired by the cartoon Casper but changing the 1st letter to J. It just sounds nice. =D
come on lah who has a dog that name Jasper? well so far I haven't heard of any dog having that name.

So yea that's the 1st day he was there. He was practically quiet, we wiped him with a towel, and try to blow dry him with a hair dryer but is too hot, so he doesn't like the hair dryer at all. The quiet boy was sitting at the corner of the house, not moving anywhere at all. Then I played the piano try to attract him with the music, unfortunately, he's still getting used to the environment.
Still sitting at a corner watching every1 and observing around. Well I still remember that time his ears were still bent down, and not even straight up.
So then the 1st day we leave him in our maid's room and stay overnight there. I couldn't remember how tiny he was that he could hide underneath the shelf that is really small the space.
We went to the pet shop and bought him a band and a string. So when we reach home went into the maid, he started waving his tail and sticking to us. Awww such a lovely boy.
So the 1st night, he poop and pee in my maid's room, poor kakak was awake the whole nite, bcaz this Jasper boy kept barking at her asking her to clean up his poop and pee, so that he can have a good sleep.

Then we decided to put him into the kitchen and sleep on the 2nd night, so he barked non-stop at nite, my elder bro has to keep him company for the entire night. well he was still a baby, so he needs some1 to be there. After a few days, he started barking at strangers, start from 1 of my bro's friend, he's the poor victim, hahaha. Then slowly to the gas fella, he really hate the gas tong, I seriously have no idea why.
So he wasn't toilet trained, and when he slept under the sofa, we tried to make his ears stand up straight and slowly he has his perfect ears that we wish he should be. Well after that we regret.


so slowly he grew and grew, we couldn't bear to put him in the house anymore because he just pee everywhere and getting fiercer, so we have no choice but to change his chain and tie him outside. Well he is one hell of a fierce dog. He tried to fight with my neighbor's german shepard which was triple of his size. and guess what, He won. well am not proud of it. He turned out to be so fierce that is good to keep him outside so that he can keep our house safe.



well I have to say that, my dog isn't smart, he only knows how to listen sit, "mum mum"(FOOD) and walk walk. Not even his name~!! I guess he's just being bias. He prefers my brothers more. Well they tend to play with him alot. I still remember he has his moments of being real active and he'll start to bite every1, where we have to climb really high and he'll try to reach us. But he was actually just playing but couldn't control himself.

So whatelse about him, I have to say that i got the feeling he's gay. Man I played with him, bring him out for a walk, feed him more than my brothers do. and He always prefers my brother. Even my dad~!!! My dad never even treat him nice before, he was looking for my dad when he sees me and my dad =(



so this fella used to have fleas all around him, HUGE ONES!! gosh u seriously can't imagine how gross it can be, we practically have to help him to pluck it out everyday, and kill those fleas. And there're too much even the flea shampoo doesn't help, so we tried out the flea collar. Man that thing works! until it expires, more fleas came to him, and we bought a new 1, aha, bye bye fleas.


so this dog, whenever my friends get to see the picture of him, they'll be like "OMG YOUR DOG IS SOO CUTE" or "AWWWW your dog is sooo adorable." But once they see him in real life they said "OMG, your dog is crazy!"
hahaha even dog lovers doesn't help, he's really 1 hell of a fierce dog. I got bitten by him bitten by him before while trying to stop him from barking at my friends.
and there's a scar there at my feet now.

so this dog, is really the greatest survivor. To be honest, I've never in my life sent him to vet. well cz my parents didn't want to, they find him really a big hectic. I still remember once, his skin start to have a hole, slowly it became really big, ya i know is disgusting. Then my parents say is time for this dog to die, and omg he's like only how old. So 1 day we suddenly saw him running and wahlah, he survived. Seriously that was serious, well we have smth more serious that came up after few years. His balls start to rot and the skin is peeling off, he couldn't move properly as well, walking really slow. Then 1 day he started running again. Isn't he a great big survivor??

So as you can see he has alot of fur~!!!! really alot! and it kept falling off, but still alot! hahaha
so is not surprise for you to see fur everywhere my house last time.
oh btw, he has different kinds of name being called.
Most of the time we called him Jasper, but he still have nickname as well, i know rite dog having a nickname?? haha
We sometimes call him "perper boy", "jasper boy", "baby lang" that means that is baby wolf in mandarin, well doesn't he looks like a wolf??

so he will always bark at us when is time to go for a walk, and is time to eat. He knows his routine well. Me and my family will always argue about not wanting to bring him for a walk. But still most of the time me, my younger bro and my mom are the ones that always bring him for a walk in the evening. So yea, is great to see some funny moments of him thou.
Sooner, he's turning old, seeing that he did not finish up his food and keeping it till the next day shows that how wise is he to keep some food for himself the next day. Walking and running for a while and he started to pant. Sleeping more than usual where he can easily wake up normally. Getting lazier to get up when any of us passed by him.

Just right before my family goes to China, he's acting really weirdly, he didn't run out from the house when is time for a walk. He walks really slow. He is breathing really hard, and He will start to pant sometimes. It worries me. So then my family left for 5 days. Day by day, 1st seeing him really sleepy and tired not getting up much, eyes turn really watery, nose is really dry, started coughing. Then his vision gets really blur, although i'm not an expert, but I could tell when he didn't dare to come down from the stairs. 1 day when I was back home, I saw him got stuck at 1 of the flower pot, and knowing that he's really blind already. He kept banging to the wall while walking. The next day, he didn't get up at all, I assume that he's just tired, but after a long day, He just couldn't get up, he was trying to crawl but couldn't, the way he tried to move just made me really sad, and I needed my family soo badly, wishing that he could be strong until the family is back. So finally the family is back, having the family back made me felt so much better, but Jasper couldn't get to see any1 of them. Not responding to any of our voice.


Since I told them that is really time for him, and every1 agreed to put him to sleep the next day.
So the next day, I left work really early, and we tried to drag him on to a big cloth and put him into a basket. Realizing that he really can't stand up and pee, see how suffering is him. He was trying to get out from the basket, but got held on by us. In the car, he was really laying down well, not moving at all. Till we reached the vet, he was trying to climb up again, but my bro held him onto his arms. Doctor asked about his condition, and checked, realized that not only his blind and couldn't move, he's deaf as well. He could be still surviving even thou he's just blind and deaf, but couldn't move is hard for him. So yes decision made. 1st jap made to made him sleep, can still see him breathing and slowly he close his eyes and fell asleep. But all of us started to shed our tears, neither of us could control anymore. After that dr needs my brother's help to held on to his hand to look for his vein. so I helped to carry his head, I can feel that he's really asleep comfortly in my arms. then the 2nd injection goes in, his body curled up and his eyes slowly opened, doctor says that when a dog is dead their eyes are normally open. looked at the time is 2.40pm. There goes Jasper resting in peace.
It was really hard for the 3 of us, to control our tears. We couldn't helped to loose him but didn't want him to suffer either.
and this is how he looks after death. Brought him back home and decided to sent him to cremate.
Put him into his so called "coffin" which is actually just a styrofoam box. Throw him some flowers, played the chant for him and sealed up the box.


There goes Jasper resting in peace at 22nd of February.

9 years of relationship with him. I may be fierce to him sometimes, but deep in my heart I still love him.
Came back home from work, was soo used to call "Jasper!" but, he's not there. During evening, is time to bring him for a walk, just realized that he's no longer there. So used to just stand by the window and watch him, and he's not there as well.
Now no1 to accompany me whenever I'm sad and I don't have any1 to sing to, any1 to laugh at being so cute. No1 barking at me for food and to walk. No 1 to finish up my food.
I may look happy to any1 when I'm outside, but deep inside my heart, I really miss him.
but life have to go on, I'm fine people. I may still be crying of Jasper and being emo about it. But I'm really doing good in life. I just miss him dearly.


oh btw, the doctor even told us that, this dog is very rare to have now, they used to be really famous last time, and is really expensive, now they have whatever toy poodle, shitzu and bla bla bla. And they call this dog japanese dog. Woah seriously didn't know my dog is that famous. So if you're looking for this dog, people don't normally sell it. Normally are given away by other ppl, so yea. My dog is rare =)

thoughts on make ups

well this is my own personal thoughts on make ups. is all based on experience, what I've seen and what I was inspired by.

well as you people know that I'm truly obsessed with cosmetics, but you don't see me having the super thick make up often, most of the time i don't even put make up.

Make up is an art, a skills and knowledge for girls in order to enhance their beauty features, well it can be use to transform their look, and some of you guys will totally freak out after seeing a girl removing their make up on their face. But why do all these girls want to make themselves soo pretty? Well they felt more confident when it comes to having a good appearance towards other people, they may want to attract some guys that they've been admiring, well sometimes is just for the sake of the job, and some of them just loooove having make up on.

Well a girl is willingly to put the effort to take their time in order to make themselves looking beautiful shows that how much time they've used up just for doing that. Plus learning how to put on make up isn't an easy job as well, it takes time for girls to learn, step by step.
I myself have no knowledge on cosmetics and make up. I just love how to see girls putting on make up since young. When i was still a small girl, I'll try to sneak in to my mother's room and use up her cosmetics and pile up as much as make up as I can, i ended up looking like a clown, but at the mean time having fun doing it.
So when i got older, i kinda hated having cosmetics on, I used to think that people are fake when they have cosmetics on, and not being natural enough. Sooner I was amazed by this make up artist from youtube known as Michelle Phan. Slowly I start to search around on other gurus, and wahlah here I am now, being soo obsessed in making myself prettier.
So i learn by watching youtube videos from different make up artist, slowly doing some research, checking out reviews on what are the good cosmetics and tried on different types of it. Investing all my money on it. To some people I may be wasting money, but I gain happiness from it.

Of course i felt kinda wasted for buying so much and ended up not using that much, but there's 1 benefit, I love to help people as well. Start off by helping the choir members, dancers from temple, and that time, I was still very bad in it. Looking back at my own pictures with make up, GOSH! I looks like a ghost, well like i said, it takes time to learn, and by practicing and investing on good cosmetics, that's how it helps. Now I don't mind helping any1 to do make up for them for free, because i'm not a qualified make up artist, not certificates and not much experience. But I still love doing it. =)

As guys, most of them would prefer having their girls don't have any make up and being natural all the time, but come on, not all the girls in the whole wide world can look pretty without having make up on, well I'm 1 of them. Seriously having a girl investing their money on cosmetics and skin care products is a big sacrifice for them. How much time they've used up to try to make themselves pretty, and don't think that's it. Whenever they got home, how tired are they they still have to make sure that they remove their make up properly, fyi is a no no for any1 to have make up on to sleep. Is gonna cause their skin condition to be bad or worse.
So guys, do appreciate on how girls that put on make up.

and to the girls out there, I'm not trying to convince you to put on make up everytime and make it a must. If you don't like it is okay, no1 is gonna force you. Yes some of you may be really lazy to do so, well I am lazy as well, but look at the result after how much effort you've put on, isn't it great? But try not to put on the whole pile of make up on your face, you don't need that, u just need the right amount to enhance your features. Well you do not want to scare off any guys after showing them ur naked face rite? and overdoing it can scare of some guys as well. Try to seek for help from people that knows abt it, do some research or watch youtube videos, there're lots of awesome gurus there with different type of features that can help you.
well most important is your skin care routine, putting on cosmetic can enhance your features, but having a good skin helps better in it. With a good skin you'll have to put lesser make up and you won't freak out that much guys.


Besides, make up can be an art. I personally am impressed with lots of other people outside there, using such a simple thing and they could create a beautiful canvas, portrait or whatever you all it on their eyes, face and others. Of course that stage is kinda hard to achieve. Oh wells I'm still learning, and have more to learn. Hopefully 1 day I could really be 1 of the most successful 1, doing something that I like.

So i guess that's my thoughts of it. More to come about cosmetics =)
If any of you disagree with me is okay, every1 has their own thoughts on it.
Take care peeps
much love

2011's valentine

well for 2011's
u must be wondering why?
is it because i'm jealous of other people receiving chocolates, flowers, candies, having a romantic date.
the answer is NO

well i don't even bother about all these, as I'm still single
now u might be thinking "owh, that's why"
BUT STILL NO~

if u notice i did mention for the year 2011
well my bestie Cheong Hvey Jci a.k.a Maria is gonna catch a flight at 9am and fly to aussie
and I'm not gonna see her for 2 years. =(
well not only that, but I don't get to send her off due to being loyal to work. *ya rite*
yes i post this to make her cry~! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA i know i'm the devil

i don't know what more to say here, but i know she's gonna cry for mua, and so do I xp
PLEASE maria cheong, have a farewell with us aite??!!!

full love from me~! =(

travel

I WANNA GO TO SOMEWHERE THIS YEAR!!
I DON'T CARE!!
could it be overseas? beach? a shopping heaven? i don't know
but I REALLY WANNA GO AND HAVE A TRIP THIS YEAR!!!!

decision made

yes i've made the decision.

"What decision?"

well i'm soo sorry to make you all even more curious, because I'm unable to reveal it first until it has to be done. Perhaps if you ask me privately I may consider to answer you =)

tmr is back to work day.
I just realize I've been a year there, still remember how excited I got when is the 1st day of working, how blur I was, and how nervous I was. Well those were the silly moments, I still remember it takes such a loooong time for me to cut the things perfectly. I can't even cut with blades confidently, but now, fuiyo~! jus sweep across, and wahlah. oh wells, practice makes things perfect thou.

and why the hell am I still blogging at this time?
I just couldn't sleep =(
I'm gonna be sooooooo tired tmr.

oh wells people, i need some suggestion on what to post on this blog. Seriously out of idea, I know i need more pictures, and last time I'll make my post as colurful as I can, but now, I'm just too lazy....
well will definitely appreciate all of the suggestion given by you all and will try to fulfil it =)

much love from me
*toodles*

hello 2011

well is 2011, should I be "yay-ing"??
I know i'm not suppose to be blogging right now as I have a date with erhem, my assignment.
Is not as bad as I think, I'M JUST TOOO LAZY~~~
well and I'm not soo smart it takes time for me to understand a thing. Do you have those moments that you suddenly just turn smart, well not exactly smart but just that you suddenly found whatever you need and you can do, well this is me when it comes to last minute work.
So overall have i finish yet? no
A lot more to go? Yes
But do I know what am I gonna do? Yes
I definitely know how am I gonna type out my assignment
and is definitely a YAY for me.
well before this everyday i've been telling myself by tmr i shall start my assignment and it has been said like erm...... more than a week??!! LOL
Yes i tend to delay my work until the last minute, if it doesn't affect other people.

So what the hell am I doing this whole day of 31st of December 2010??
basically I stayed at home the whole damm day, watching some shows, videos, facebook, msn, tweets you said it all. I even have myself to eat a lot~ where i thought I could start doing work after that and i got sleepy and of course i took a nap, until I got up, thought of starting and guess what? No I've not started, I'm such a lazy girl, I know~
well in the other way, I'm still enjoying my holidays lah

and when it strikes 12am of 1st Jan 2011, I rush outside to look for fireworks recorded a video since i fail to take some nice ones. Believe me or not, I was actually crying when I was back home, well it was chilly, quiet and lonely. Somehow I just felt that 2011 is gonna be a hard year that I'm gona have, am still thinking if I should give up on my studies after the 1st semester? or I should just continue for the sake of satisfying my parents and get a very nice degree. Well I still can't decide. So I was down, even chatting with a few friends online, it doesn't really keep me inspired or to be stronger, well nice words came out from my mouth saying that I'll be fine and everything, but that time I wasn't thinking of that.
and guess what change my mind to be a little cheerful?
ASSIGNMENT~!

WHAT ARE YOU SERIOUS???!!
yes, is true, when i stop chatting, I decided to start doing assignment as I know I don't have much time left, and I gotta stop giving myself any excuse for not being able to finish it. So I decided to read through everything again, and somehow, my mind just pop out soooo many answers to my assignment, and THAT'S WHEN I FELT BETTER, HELL YEA~!!
I'm definitely the kind of person that, I'll be real happy when I'm able to know the answers of something out of my expectations or boundaries. I told myself not to be such a perfectionist anymore, as I look waay upon myself which deep inside I know i can't do it, but still forcing myself just for the sake of satisfying other people. So I'm just gonna go through the flow of what is gonna happen and not force myself till the stage where i'll cry like a typical emo girl or cry baby, well i am still a cry baby. But to know when the right moment is here, I shall go with it =)

Besides, people that do chat with me, well you guys did entertained me, and at least I doesn't feel soo lonely until my parents got home, before it strikes 12 gosh seriously spending the new year's eve alone at home, is really scary. But when some1 knocked my room door before 1am, I opened of course I got a shocked somehow, but is my mom, for the 1st time, I'm soooooo glad to see both of my parents coming home although they're always out every friday night. It seems like they've left me for years or months LOL. But I'm just very very very very very glad to see they're home, at least I'm not soo lonely at home anymore =)

So don't ask me about my new year's resolution, I have waaaay to many things in my mind that I want, but I'm very sure that I'm unable to fulfill all of it. So when the time comes, I shall just go along the flow.
SOooo
hopefully i'm able to stay this happy for a long time, which I know is impossible. Like i said, go along the flow =)
once again is a bye bye to 2010 and you'll never get to meet 2010 again, but say hello to 2011
Much love from me

toodles