i shall say

this is just the start of my degree

i still remember that night after orientation, i started crying while waiting at the bus stop, yes with make up on tat day, the sky was sooo dark, is scary, and i was feeling stressed up.
Not much people could really understand my feelings, some of them think that i'll kept mentioning the word "stress" over any small thing, no, when i mentioned that means i've reached till a serious stage, and i couldn't stop crying all the way home.

but i told myself to give a good try, perhaps it might change my life, yes it does have benefits, is just a waste of time and money for now to me. Is really stressful and not as easy as you guys think. Just so u know i'm not a very smart person, i'm not a bookworm, i need lots of explanation and practice to truly understand whatever was said.

so my current daily routine. where i have to go to work early in the morning by 7.30am and working till 2pm, which i felt real bad for leaving so early, and leaving sara there to do the work.
and then rushed back home to take a real short shower and i have to leave already. will stuck in the jam and going thru the horrible parking lots, where i'll always get nervous whenever i have to do a parking, a side parking somemore.
I have to admit that i scratch some1's car just 2 days ago, i have no choice, those ppl park at that place which they're not supposed to, and is either i have to scratch the left car or the right car, and the right car turned to be a victim, i felt sooo sorry for that.
and class ends at 7.30pm and gotta stuck in the jam for some time. by the time i reached home, showered and dinner, and i'm dead tired, which i'm suppose to study and i have to start assignments from now. *SCARY*

i really do hope that i'm able to cope up with both things. convincing myself to do it for the sake of getting a higher pay, and try to finish it as fast as possible.
yes i truly need lots of support and ppl please convinced me to continue, i can really give up anytime.

so currently i have melanie and emily there around me in the class, am so greatful to have them or else i'm really gonna suffer more. i'm wishing for a higher pay now, so i could really afford my studies, and yes i'm paying for my studies alll the time~!! is not cheap at all. this is one of the reason why i'm feeling so stressed up.

well STAY STRONG KELLY!!!